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Groom your child, spouse’s talents


By Dickson Tumuramye

Everyone grows with ambitions and dreams. Each one of us has something that we desired to become in future.
Some dreamed of studying and becoming engineers, doctors, teachers, lawyers, social workers among others. Most of the future dreams are inclined to formal education.
Because of the colonial systems, we are trained to believe that every success can be attained through formal education.
One must study harder, acquire a certificate in any profession, get a white collar job and then start earning money.
As a result, we were not taken through informal education which emphasises developing a child’s livelihood skills and talents that enhance creativity and innovation.
Everyone has unique abilities. These abilities which may be natural or through training or God-given, are what we call talents or gifts (these words will be used interchangeably in this article).
There are so many things we do without necessarily learning them from class. I have seen many people who are successful in life because of their talents/gifts.
Some were nurtured well and others found themselves growing into their talent by themselves.
A talent is the ability that results from learning, development and discipline practice.

Identifying talents
Identifying one’s talent has no time limit. There are some adults who are still failing to discover their talents or gifts to-date.
But I want to tell you that you can still now discover your talent. Every individual must take an interest of recognising and distinguishing unique abilities they have.
Spouses can help each other to identify special talents each may have. Parents have all the prospect of keenly observing their children and identify such talents.
You can identify these talents through the child/spouse’s areas of interest overtime, their consistent ideas and aspirations, hobbies, preferences, curiosity.
Some also go on to use their talents when they learn that they have them. That is what some people like musicians and athletes do.
You must practice as you groomyour talent in order to be perfect.
A spouse’s or parent’s positive affirmations can trigger someone’s talent.
Take time to appreciate the little thing someone has tried to do with that talent.
Words like you are talented/gifted, you can make it, you are very good at that, keep it up, you are doing it well or public praise is enough to build self-confidence and high esteem in them.
This puts them to greater heights and advance for more perfection of that talent.

Grooming talent
If you have identified a unique gift with your child or spouse, work towards it. This goes with preparing and training either a child or spouse in that particular activity.
This could be sports, Music Dance and Drama (MDD), public speaking, intercessions, preaching, creativity, innovation, leadership, and athletics among others.
Pay attention to what unique things one has. This calls for investing time to study that person’s interests and dreams, observing critically and discovering how you can come in to groom them.
You also have to invest financially where necessary. Choose a curriculum that best suits your child’s ambitions and dreams.
Grooming takes a deliberate decision as well. You cannot desire to see that dream or talent come to pass without giving it all you can.
Your full time involvement in your person’s life helps them appreciate who you are into their lives. It keeps them accountable to you and work hard to get to where they desire.
In case of a child, you need to get to their level and understanding. This bridges the gap and brings you closer to learn from them, what they prefer, how to put your mind close to theirs and how best you can intervene.
You cannot remain an authoritative parent and expect to groom this child.
There will be no genuine relationship and it may be hard to quickly understand how to be part of their dream, talent or gift.
Any grooming in a certain skill/talent prospers well when a coach is present in your child’s/spouse’s life.
Identify a coach or a mentor for your child or spouse. This mentor should be someone with expertise in the area of interest.
Mentors will fill the missing gap and put in order what is not right. There can never be a successful football team without a good coach.
I request each one of us to make our homes number one talent incubation centre. Since charity begins at home, even a better talent development for your members should be well motivated from there.

The writer is a child advocate, parenting coach and marriage counselor.


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