Home Lead Story We are all needy: turning our backs to each other

We are all needy: turning our backs to each other

627
0
SHARE

By Rev Can Grace Kaiso

The Covid-19 experience for most of us has been traumatic; with the loss of family members, friends, livelihoods, meaning and hope in life.

However, it has also been one of those rare occasions when the global human family has had their routines so disrupted that it had to stop, and forced to reflect on key questions regarding life.

As one of my favorite spiritual mentors, CS Lewis, put it: “God whispers to us in times of peace, but shouts to us in times of tragedy.”

Some of the key areas that God seems to have been shouting to us especially at the peak of the epidemic included: the fragility and unpredictability of life, our own vulnerability and how we need so little to get by in life, the value of maintaining a healthy relationship with God, our fellow human beings and mother nature, and to let go of our anxieties regarding the world and its future because they are truly in God’s care and hands.

We need others to help our search for God’s will in whatever the specific circumstances of our life. (Photo/Courtesy)

Unfortunately, however, most of these lessons have lost their grip over us.

Slowly but steadily, we are going back to what life was: careless living, selfish ambition, building economic empires for prestige, treating others and the environment as expendable tools to service our egos and selfish goals.

Also investing heavily in material things when we are bankrupt before God and our fellow human beings.

This withstanding, the daily events around us like sickness, wars, disasters and increasing human need, continue to unsettle and challenge us to review our choices, priorities and treasures.

We need each other
One of the realities of life is that, we are created to accompany each other along this unpredictable journey of life.
We need others to provide support when we experience suffering, setbacks and temptations.

We need others to give opportunities for sharing our time and resources.

We need others to correct our sometimes-imbalanced interpretation of the Bible. We need others to control our sinful pride and greed when all is going well and when we are successful in terms of the world’s standards.

We need others to help our search for God’s will in whatever the specific circumstances of our life.

As Saint Paul puts it, “none of us lives to himself alone and none of us dies to himself alone” (Romans 14:7).

Allowing ourselves to be accompanied is not easy, it is seen as debasing oneself, especially for those in high positions in society, and those who appear to have everything holding together, when actually they are dying inside.

The increasing mental health challenges in our communities might be due to the fact that many of us are not willing to open up and seek support in our areas of struggle.

Many families are struggling with issues which they could get help for, but are either too proud or ashamed to seek help.

Seeking help is not a sign of weakness. (Photo/Courtesy)

At times people might attempt to reach out to us, when in trying situations, but our response puts them off.

It is easier to choose to accompany those in trying moments, especially if they have the capacity to reciprocate.

For the others, we tend to respond out of guilt or the need to quieten our conscience and not in the spirit of bearing each other’s burdens.

How do we help?
It has become common for half of the calls one receives in a day, to be seeking attention or some form of assistance.

These could be from clan or family members, friends, colleagues at work, or even total strangers.

To a certain extent, we are all struggling with this reality and to say the least, it can be stressful.

The temptation is often for us to turn our back to them, often arguing or comforting ourselves, ‘I am also struggling or I don’t have enough to meet my personal needs.’

Certainly, for devout Christians even with these possible excuses we are left unsettled. Scriptures like Matthew 25:37 race through our minds and haunt us.

“Lord, when did we see you hungry, or thirsty? When did we see you without a place to stay?

“Or when did we see you without clothes or sick or in prison? When did we see any of this and not help you?’

“The King will answer, the truth is, anything you refused to do for any of my people here, you refused to do for me.”

For failing to recognise Jesus among the hungry, the poor, the prisoner, the sick and the stranger, people will go away to be punished.

For those who knew that Jesus Christ is Lord of all, and His presence fills the universe with grace and therefore could not predict nor control the places of meeting Him; they will go and enjoy eternal life.

It is inexcusable and costly for a Christian to turn their back on those in need.

This is irrespective of whether the recipient has the capacity to put to good use the support needed.

We must stop asking: why is it that these people come to us, even when God is well aware that left on our own?

I have also been wrestling with this question. My reflections have led me to three insights that God is using to transform me into a more gracious and caring person.

Our connectedness to everyone else, the poor, the rich, the powerful, the weak, the sick, the undeserving, the young, the old, women and men, children and those with disabilities.

The more I have allowed myself to feel this interconnectedness, the more God has broken my barriers and defenses towards indiscriminate compassion.

Increasingly, I have come to appreciate that when Jesus taught His disciples to pray in Matthew 6:9), He addressed God as ‘our’ Father; He is the father of all, not only of my family, clan, tribal members, even to those I consider undeserving; the Zacchaeus and prodigal sons and daughters of this world.

He is not only Father to members of my Church, religion, political party, investment club of cycle, He is also father to the struggling poor, the atheist, and to those in the political opposition.

Jesus demonstrated this over and over again in His ministry, reaching out to everybody, breaking down the barriers, of race, class and gender; to the contestation of the disciples in His company, who had set boundaries for those entitled to God’s love and care.

It seems to me that acknowledging our shared humanity is the starting point towards becoming instruments of God’s compassion and care in this hurting and needy world.

To a certain extent, we are all struggling with the reality of life.

We can offer more help
The second insight is that, those in Christ are no longer alone; Christ lives in them and this connection links them to inexhaustible resources in Him.

They are equipped to resource others in giving guidance, encouragement and meeting their spiritual and physical needs.

No one in Christ can say they do not have anything to bless the other with. John 15:4, John 14:12, Matthew 28:20.

In Acts when Peter is confronted with the opportunity to extend compassion to a crippled man, he did not have money, which the lame person might have expected.

He calls on the other resources in Christ. “I don’t have any silver or gold, but I do have something else I give you, By the power of Jesus Christ from Nazareth -stand up and walk. Then Peter took the man’s right hand and lifted him up.

“Immediately his feet and legs became strong. He stood on his feet and began to walk” (Acts 3:4-8).

We have often narrowed care and compassion to money, which should not be the case.

When we lost our 28-year- old daughter, we did not need money. We needed people who would stay by us, to talk with, and to help us make sense of our loss and guide our steps towards healing.

Many people from different walks of life were able to provide us with the comfort we desperately needed.

We have many people that are hurting in our midst, those who are grieving or families that are falling apart.

We, too, might be victims of the various storms of life. There is increasing trauma in society, due unresolved conflict, violations of rights, resource and power struggle in families.

All these and woundedness we carry with us, call for reawakening among the believers to the ministry of care and compassion.

Our response might take different forms depending on how we feel guided.

It might involve listening, walking along side, advocating, catalyzing, building bridges across ethnic, cultural and religious barriers.

As Christians we are endowed with the capacity to respond to various situations of need.

Whatever the case, Paul has reminded us that the power that rose Jesus Christ from the dead is available to believers.

So, let us use it with wisdom to make life more bearable, meaningful and hopeful for each other (Ephesians 1:19).

Time
Time management is one area of continuous challenge. Our priorities are reflected in the way we allocate our time.

This is one area we need to learn from Jesus Christ. His mission and ministry are often summed up as that of mercy and compassion because of the time He allocated to these two.

He allowed His routines to be interrupted, to listen to the lonely cries of those in need (Mark 10:46, Luke 8:43, John 8:11) and brought hope to depressed (Luke 24:13).

The other way to look at this is through the eyes of the Parable of the Talents in Matthew 25:14-30.

Jesus tells this story before He is delivered up to captivity and the death on the Cross.

Despite the popular title attached to it, the story is not about money, or investment; it is about time.

It is about the time in which we find ourselves; the time between the beginning and the end.

It is about engagement; what we do with what we have and where we are.

When the master in the parable went away, he did not tell his servants how long he would be or when he would return. He left them in a state of insecurity.

What is important is not what we do when He returns, but rather what is to be done in the meantime.

We are not simply to wait until He comes, until it all ends. Like Jesus, we are called to do the works of Him who sent us and we must not grow weary in well doing (Galatians 6:9).

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here